Hmm…

I searched Google Images for “swinging monkey” for a classroom thing, and this is what I got.  Not quite what I meant…  🙂

Grocery Getters

Some very wonderful, generous friends are lending me their vehicle while they are out of town, as mine is in the shop.  It is an SUV crossover, which is the kind of vehicle my coworkers affectionately call a “grocery getter.”  You know, you get pregnant, and you have to trade your cute little 2-door sports car for a “grocery getter.”  Yesterday, the first day I was borrowing it, guess what I had to do?  Go get groceries, of course!  🙂  So I told my sister about this, and let me show you how the conversation went from there:

The Grocery Getter

The Mini Grocery Getter

The Micro Grocery Getter

The Nano Grocery Getter

God’s sense of humor

“God wants you to be an adulteror?”

“God got a virgin pregnant by magic.  God is not playing by the rules.”

–Grey’s Anatomy

A church pastor had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc.

The kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car and pulled it until the tree bent down, he could then reach up and get the kitten.

That’s what he did, all the while checking his progress in the car. He then figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would be bent sufficiently for him to reach the kitten. But as he moved the car a little further forward, the rope broke.

The tree went “boing!” and the kitten instantly sailed through the air -out of sight.

The pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the neighborhood asking people if they’d seen a little kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten. So he prayed, “Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping,” and went on about his business.

A few days later he was at the grocery store, and met one of his church members. He happened to look into her shopping cart and was amazed to see cat food. This woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, “Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?”

She replied, “You won’t believe this,” and then told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing. Then a few days before, the child had begged again, so the Mom finally told her little girl, “Well, if God gives you a cat, I’ll let you keep it.”  She told the pastor, “I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won’t believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her.”

Never underestimate the Power of God and His unique sense of humor!

A guy, a girl, and a skateboard…

I just saw the funniest thing.  A guy and girl came out of my apartment building and walked toward the street, like they were going to their car.  The girl was carrying a purse and the guy was carrying a skateboard.  They got to the street, and the guy set the skateboard down on the pavement.  Then, the girl sat down on the front of the skateboard, settled her purse on her lap and tucked her knees up to her chin.  There was probably less than a foot of space left, and the guy stepped onto the back of it and took off down the street!  I wonder how far they’re going on their “tandem” skateboard! 

How could there be a hole???

2.jpgThanks to my friend Blake, I will be spending the rest of my evening printing out this picture, cutting out the pieces, and trying to figure out where the hole came from! 

…to see a lamb at school…

You didn’t think I could go very long into the school year without telling a cute kid story, did you???

I have a little boy in my room who was in preschool with another teacher in the building last year.  He’s always talking about Mrs. L this, and Mrs. L that.  “Mrs. L took me outside to play last year.”  “I practiced a fire drill with Mrs. L before.”  “Mrs. L didn’t have this game in her class.”  You get the idea.  One day we were singing Mary Had a Little Lamb.  We got to the verse about taking the lamb to school, and I asked the kids, “Have you ever seen a lamb at school?”  I was expecting them to say, no that’s silly, of course not.  This little guy pipes up, serious as can be, “No, Mrs. L never brought a lamb to school!”

a quick funny…

Okay, I’ve got a new one for you…

Have you ever heard of the bread-ninja man?

One of my students has been asking for about two months if we could read the book about the “bread-ninja man.”  I’ve been telling him that I don’t think I have a book about any kind of ninja people, not even the ninja turtles.  I finally figured it out this week.  I’ll give you a hint:

Run, run as fast as you can!  You can’t catch me, I’m the bread-ninja man!!!

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