In This Moment

I have more to say about this teacher.  🙂

I notice that this teacher seems to be totally in the moment.  Of course you would be more on your game if you were being recorded, but still, it makes me reflect…

The last three weeks have been an experiment in the field of superpowers.  Experiment failed; I have none.  WAAAAYYY too much to do, nowhere near enough time, and getting worse day by day.  Too much paperwork.  Too many assessments.  Way too many things I need to do one-on-one with each kid.  I really need all the kids to go home so I have time to do my work.  (You understand, I’m a teacher?  You see how backwards that is???)  It’s the nature of the beast, but oh sweet soap on a rope, it sucks sometimes.

So, when I am in front of my class teaching a lesson about, let’s say, cause and effect…I am NOT thinking about cause and effect.  Or the pig and the pancake.  Or even the kids.  I am thinking about the mountain of paperwork on my desk that is NOT getting smaller while I stand over here and teach.  I am resentful of the concept of cause and effect, to take time away from that mountain of paperwork that actually has a deadline.  I am resentful of the pig who can’t seem to get her act together and needs to cause all these effects.

And yes, I am resentful of the kids.  Just for being there, intruding in my classroom when I need peace and quiet and TIME to finish all that paperwork.

And yet, I am the adult.  It is my job to be a shield between the kids and the crazy.  Sadly, I do not have superpowers.  Some days, I can’t absorb all of the crazy, and some of it gets passed along to the six-year-olds.  Unfortunately, that’s the nature of the beast when you’re a six-year-old these days.

Does this teacher in the video have a mountain of paperwork on her desk?  Most likely.  Does she get a whole pile of crazy handed down to her every day?  Surely she does.  And yet, as far as the kids can tell, the only thing on her mind right now is that stinkin’ pig and all the cause and effect!  As far as the kids can tell, she finds the concept of cause and effect fascinating!  

Today, I remembered.  I remembered that beyond the paperwork mountain, there are delightful people in the little red and blue chairs.  I remembered that beyond the paperwork mountain, there is fun to be had.  And every time I sang, “Oh claa-aass!” and heard them all respond, “Oh ye-ess!” …there is fun to be had!

Living in the moment is SO hard for me.  Teaching or otherwise.  I don’t dwell in the past, but I reach too far into the future.  I make choices based upon what I hope will happen in five years.  Even through the course of a day, I am always looking forward to the next thing, and rarely just sitting in now.  But THIS moment is all I have.  Yesterday is gone, and we are not promised tomorrow.

In THIS moment, maybe the kids are in the room.  Maybe they have cleaned up the room and they are sitting on the rug, waiting for a reading minilesson.  Maybe they are chasing each other around, releasing the crazy that has been passed down to them.  But in THIS moment, I know one thing:  They are HERE.  The mountain of paperwork…well, it won’t exactly wait.  Deadlines are deadlines.  But it will have to wait for 3:35, because in THIS moment, I need to be HERE.

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