Too Much & Not Enough

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most.

We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?’

Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won’t feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Maryanne Williamson

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I’ve heard before the idea that women’s insecurities stem from feeling like too much or not enough.  Or feeling both at the same time.  I don’t remember where I read it, and I’m sure the same thing could be said for men, but in this particular discussion, the mystery author was talking about women’s tendencies toward insecurity. 

“I am too much.  I have emotions and opinions and my man doesn’t like that.  In fact, it scares him when I have such strong emotions.  He doesn’t seem to react to the world like that, with such strong emotion, and me having more emotion than him upsets the balance of the relationship.  I am too much.  If I want to keep his love and approval, I can’t be so much.”

“I am not enough.  I am not skinny enough.  I am not rich enough.  I am not smart enough.  I am not nice enough.  I am not mean enough.  I am not spontaneous enough.  I am not responsible enough.  If I want to keep his love and approval, I need to be more.”

Instead of a man, these voices could be talking about a boss or a parent or nearly anyone.  Can’t you just completely identify with both sides?  No wonder we’re so screwed up!!! 

Of course, as strongly as we can identify with both sides, they are worthless as a measuring tool.  If I am fighting insecurity (measuring myself), another person’s approval won’t fix it.  If someone is disapproving of me (measuring someone else), my changing to fit their standards won’t fix it.  The problem lies in the measuring, not in what is being measured.

It’s tricky, this notion of living in a human world with a human mind, and yet refraining from evaluating our self-worth based upon, let’s face it, other humans!  Even more than we are constrained by the boundaries of humanity, we are spiritual beings, created by God.  God does not see us through the lense of human limitations.  As difficult as it is to wrap my mind around it, God sees each of us with no measuring stick whatsoever.  God is love, and love does not measure.

So I will stand up and say, in the words of Ms. Williamson:  I am brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous!

Okay, I’m not famous.

But I am enough, and I am not too much. 

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“He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross.  And having disarmed the powers and authorities, he made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross.

Therefore do not let anyone judge you by what you eat or drink, or with regard to a religious festival, a New Moon celebration or a Sabbath day.  These are a shadow of the things that were to come; the reality, however, is found in Christ.”

–Colossians 2:13-17

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(As our pastor said this morning, explaining that the mentioned events were related to the strictness of Judaism at that time and in that place, “Raise your hand if you’ve ever been judged for an inadequate New Moon celebration!”  Haha!)

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Sarah
    Aug 15, 2011 @ 15:48:14

    Actually, you are famous. Haven’t you ever been walking, say, in the mall and someone knew your name? (In fact, all teachers are famous – they just don’t know it.)

    Reply

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