Brothers and Sisters …and Husband?

Tonight I went to see Bride Wars.  It was a good chick flick.  If you like the chick flicks, I expect you’ll like Bride Wars!  I won’t give anything away, or tell you what happens, or ruin any part of the plot for you, I promise.  But I assume that if you know chick flicks, you know it’s a happy ending. 

Sometimes in life there really are bonds formed that can never be broken. Sometimes you really can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what; maybe you’ll find it in a spouse and celebrate it with your dream wedding, but there is also the chance that the one person you can count on for a lifetime, the one person who knows you, sometimes better than you know yourself, is the same person who’s been standing beside you all along.

So true.  I think of siblings.  You have a longer relationship with your brothers and sisters, in general, than any other relationship in your life.  Of course every family dynamic is different, but I can definitely say that Sarah, Mark, and Megan are those people that I can count on for a lifetime.  When I am spending time with them, I do not find myself concerned with how I look, or how successful I am, or anything like that.  Because they have been there from the beginning, they’ll be there until the end.  They don’t care if I’m fat or skinny, if am rich or poor, if I am wearing makeup or dressed in my pajamas!  We don’t even really see those things in each other.  We just want to be together. 

I think our childhood taught us about committment.  My brother and sisters were people who were always there, no matter what.  Whether they were mean to me, or I was mean to them, there they were!  Specifically Sarah and I experienced this bonding through fire, so to speak, since we were so close in age and shared so much.  I remember a few times of going to bed so mad at each other that we’d be literally kicking each other under the covers.  But nonetheless, there she was, and there I was!  If someone would have said to me, in that moment, “Do you wish you could be an only child?”  I would have said, “Huh?  What do you mean, an only child?”  No matter what had happened, being without them would not have crossed my mind.  Getting away from each other wasn’t even a concept that we would have considered.  That is committment!  I’ve said before, even now when we live in different cities, if Sarah and I can’t agree, we will always agree to disagree, because we just can’t be without each other.

(To be fair, we got in trouble for laughing and playing after bedtime way more often than fighting after bedtime!  We probably broke that “rule” almost daily.  And my mom’s trick?  “Make me think you’re asleep!”  We just couldn’t do it, if we pretended to be asleep, we’d fall asleep!!!  So our answer: “We can’t sleep.”  Haha!  Apologies on behalf of both of us to our mother, for years and years of that!)

When you get married, your husband is supposed to be that person for you, right?  (Or, one of those people.  We don’t just suddenly lose our previous relationships because we have a new one, of course.)  So, would it be fair to say, we are looking for a relationship that compares in some way to the comfort and committment of a sibling relationship?  If so, how can you expect a relationship that is, say, two years old, to compare to a relationship that has been building for 20+ years?

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Sarah
    Mar 15, 2009 @ 21:33:11

    Love you, too!!

    Reply

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